Can we all have a moment of silence for the year that was 2020?
Can we also take a moment to stop and acknowledge the fact that we’re now more than half way through 2021…
When did that happen? I swear it was just January!

If I’m being honest, my only goals coming into 2021 were to just survive and find some semblance of normalcy after the shit show we’d just come out of. I can safely say that in July of 2021 I am surviving for sure, but I need to shift my focus to thriving.

Things that have helped me recently:

• Audible.
• Podcasts.
• Reuniting with all things crochet.
• Writing in my journal again.
• To-do lists.
• Focusing my energy into creating/maintaining friendships.

For a very long time I felt like using Audible was, in essence, cheating on books/authors. As if not sitting down with a physical book in my hands was a cop out, but I’m here to tell you that in this busy world we find ourselves in it has helped me keep up with my reading list and simultaneously my home life.
There’s nothing more satisfying than plowing through a good book while deep cleaning the bathroom. Before you know it you’ve scrubbed the grossest parts of your home and knocked out a chapter or two of that book you’ve been hearing so much about.

Podcasts have also been a life saver for my sanity. I especially enjoy the ones that deep dive into missing persons/murder cases. It’s given me the ability to follow my dreams of being a homicide detective without having to fill the qualifications of being a road cop for a number of years. If I listened to an exceptional book on Audible and am waiting for my next credit, I pull up my podcast app and start a new investigation or check in with my friends Dax & Monica on Armchair Experts.
A few of my recent favorites are:
The Piketon Massacre
Paper Ghosts
Your Own Backyard
Culpable
The Apology Line
The Clearing
Slow Burn
The Devil Within
Tim Harold’s Campfire
Radio Rental
Smartless
Armchair Experts (only on Spotify now)
Etc…

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Please know that some of them are a bit graphic, but I’ve enjoyed each one thus far – and continue to enjoy a few of them as they release new episodes and seasons.
If you’ve listened to any good podcasts you think I should check out let me know! I’m always interested in finding new ones to binge.

As for the rest of the list up there, I’ve just been trying to slowly work back into things I used to love and that worked for me pre-pandemic.
I know I’m far more productive if I start my day with a to-do list and end it with a brain dump into my journal in the evenings. Do I beat myself up if I don’t complete my whole list that day? No. But if I have no clear direction or intentions then I tend to just putter around mindlessly and waste the day. I enjoy feeling accomplished and crossing things off the list, and sometimes I add things at the end of the day that I did on top of it… just to cross them off.
Don’t judge me.

Crochet has also always been a huge part of my life. I learned to crochet as a small child, before YouTube tutorials and the internet was a thing. I still have books of patterns and tear off cards from yarn aisles in my craft room, and I am so jealous of everyone learning today. It’s so much easier to learn from a video you can pause and rewind versus an elderly lady in a hospital that has no patience and only one color yarn.
If you’re looking into learning to crochet some of my favorite YouTubers to learn from are Toni from TLYarncrafts, Bella Coco Crochet, and Ashleigh from Sewrella (she also dyes beautiful yarns).

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Last, but certainly not least, I’ve been spending a lot of time focusing on friendships. As a human that has always tended to have solo hobbies (like reading and crochet), I realized during lock down just how much I missed and needed human connection. It’s also just nice to have people in your life that you can trust and relate to. Someone to call when you have a bad day, or just simply someone to laugh at 5,000 TikToks with via text message.

I think if there’s one thing that Covid and lock down taught us… it’s that being alone isn’t fun or easy. So from here on out I’m making time to text/call the people I care about. I’m making time to stop and go get a drink or dinner with a girlfriend, wish someone a happy birthday, send a card in the mail to a friend that lives far away.
I want people in my sphere to know that they matter, that they are loved, and that I am here for them – whether we have to be six feet apart or not.

Things I Recommend:

1 – Erin Condren planners have been my favorite now for 2+ years. She recently introduced one just this year that gives you space to have a to do list and schedule your day. You can also customize and change your covers, and they come with cute stickers if you’re like me and get bored easily. She has a ton of other cute stuff on her site as well.
https://www.erincondren.com/

2 – Another planner I’ve used in the past that I love is the Smart Life Push Journal by Chalene Johnson. It’s more structured than the Erin Condren one, and far less frilly and artsy. It’s not dated, so if you skip a day and forget you’re not wasting pages, and it gives you spaces for a to-do list, your main goal (push goal), meal planning, water intake, etc. It’s wonderful, I just liked the customization and frilly parts more of the Erin Condren one – but you can’t go wrong with this one either.
https://pushjournal.com/

3 – Bumble! Yes, it’s a dating app… but did you know they also have a friends version? You can set it up and make a friend “dating” profile and then swipe to connect with other men/women who just want to be friends. I signed up back in January and within a month I met a girl I freaking love, and we’ve become literally best friends and now gone on a beach vacation together. It really worked and it was free to set up. It’s hard to make friends as an adult, so give it a whirl!
https://bumble.com/bff

4 – TalkSpace/BetterHelp or any other virtual counseling. I used it for a short while with a discount code from one of the podcasts I loved and it really helped me get through lock down and process my emotions better. I know a lot of them have discounts for different things and accept insurance if you have it, so give it a chance if you can or need to. It was easy to set up, use, and schedule my appointments with BetterHelp, and I even was able to easily change my counselor when the first one I had wasn’t working out for me.
https://www.betterhelp.com/
https://www.talkspace.com/

If you’ve made it this far then thanks for hanging out with me today.
I hope you found something in here that is useful/helpful in your life, or at the very least you got to take a 5 minute break from the chaos that is adulthood.
I’d love to connect with you so feel free to reach out on any social medias using the hashtag #themillerswifeco or comment below and let me know how you’re doing or your favorite book or podcast these days.

XO,
-The Miller’s Wife –
Danielle